A part of me will always wonder why they never got together. Had there never been a drunken night that resulted in them getting it on? Perhaps a holiday fling after one of them confessed their feelings? Their connection can be mistaken for romance. They share the same humor and like the same things.
But it can be really exhausting to spend so much time correcting people's perceptions and answering their super invasive questions. Has it suddenly become really trendy for people who are dating to never touch each other? Is that why everyone assumes that you're dating?
Their advice usually goes something like this: "Romantic chemistry, schromatic chemistry! You already like his personality, he's located conveniently near to you, and he has genitals and everything!
What are you waiting for?! These people have clearly never had a male best friend, for there is no easier way to make sure that no guys talk to you for an entire night than to show up to a bar with a male friend in tow. I mean, you couldn't just have things in common and complimentary personalities, right?
And if you protest that this isn't true, you get a big hot earful of "He's just keeping his love a secret from you! It is true, you do have a lot in common, like a shared history and a passion for mini-golf - and isn't that the true backbone of every good relationship? Does love have to sweep you off your feet?
Maybe you guys could learn to be attracted to each other, the way your grandma keeps telling you. This is usually proceeded by A.
These are the jerks that encourage everyone else in the world to announce that you and your male BFF will eventually realize that you're in love with each other.
Yes, okay, fine, everyone was right - it's fun to date someone that you already have so much in common with! The emotional fall-out from hooking up with your male BFF and having it not work out burns hotter than a thousand suns, and is more painful than a thousand awkward OkCupid dates.
You have as many awkward brunches as it takes for you two to start being able to have fun again and to begin to forget what the other one looked like naked. And eventually, everyone moves on.
A lot of my guy friends aren't fulfilling relationships because if thy are in a relationship, i can nvr spend as much time with them as i could with a female friend. with a female friend i can spend hours with her and go out to wherever and talk about w/ev. You probably have a female best friend yourself, and there are obviously several qualities about her that you love. Those very qualities are likely why your guy has a girl best friend, too. Girls are great best friend material, dating and relationship coach Tracey Steinberg tells "Cosmopolitan" magazine. Friendship is one thing, but a best friendship is in a league of its own. It's okay for a guy to have female friends - in fact, it can be good for him to know how to relate to women - but when he has a BEST friend who's a woman, it's on a whole other level. They're so much closer and connected to each other and they'll ensure they remain a big part of each other's lives.
I forgave him, we have been together for 9 years so I cannot walk away just like that. I never knew about this woman best friend until recently. He is no longer with this other woman but he still hangs out with his woman bff.
I want to tell him to stop being friends with her? What should I do? My boyfriend has a female friend he knew for about a month before he met. She always lets me know that she knew him before I met him. He spends literally all of his time with me. My boyfriend said they were asking about me and want me to come with him next time he goes over there. He is so desperate to prove that their friendship is platonic. I do tend to overthink and I get jealous easily. I just feel uncomfortable with my man wanting to hang out with another girl besides me period.
I have no desire to hang out with any of my male friends I had before him. Because they all wanted more than a friendship and it was blatantly obvious. I get that, but it is hurtful to me regardless. But I guess he feels indebted to their friendship because of what they did for him unknowingly.
Am I crazy for feeling this way? But our close frnds and families know about us. Except her.
We are in a long distance relation since 5 years. I trust him very much but still the idea of her being an important girl makes me restless sometimes. My boyfriend has a girl bestfriend he met at his college 2 months ago. My boyfriend and I go to the same college.
And then there were chats where she was telling him that how insecure is your girlfriend and they were talking about my personal stuff, the personal stuff I told my boyfriend like my family issues, and how my dad had an affair. So please tell me the solution to this issue. Thanks for this post, I really liked the self-affirmation part that you included that helped me so much!
My boyfriend of 21 years has had a new business partner for about a year now, this was someone he had already known for about 12 years. She is very hard working and wants the business to prosper, which is good.
He has also developed a close friendship with her and has had a photo of them together on the front page of his mobile phone, which has made me feel uneasy. Any suggestions please.
So my boyfriend and I have only been together almost 4 months and a few weeks ago he moved a few states away for work so we are now long distance. That though it is slightly weird to meis fine. It just makes me kind of jealous because we as females like being shown off and it just feels like he is showing off some other girl. Have we been together too short of time for this to even bother me? I think that you are just in the beginning of your relationship. This helped a lot.
And it ruined our relationship. We tried again. Two years later and we made a contract with each other.
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This definitely helped a lot. The only issue I have with him is his best friend is a female that I know. She actually reached out to me and set us up because he was interested in me.
Is There REALLY Such A Thing As Friends of the Opposite Sex While In A Relationship??? -Derrick Jaxn
It took me a bit to agree. My best friend is also a guy. She apparently has been having marital issues of her own and I really believe they reconnected over it and she uses my boyfriend to make her husband jealous. I see her doing things to make me jealous which is even more annoying.
I do trust him however I also do have trust issues that he knows about. He gets to her defense about her marriage problems friend or not their not his issues to be concerned with. What suggestions would you have for something like this?
I would give it a little more time, just watching from the side, and see what happens next. Any type of resistance to this situation will make it worse.
I hope it helps. My boyfriend and I have been dating for 5 years and I trust him. Meanwhile he started spending time with his office colleague. He came to me after 6 months to console and he said he will never do this and never leave me again. When things began to select down I found some changes in his way.
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I got suspecious on his actions and asked him about his actions. He just lied to my face and I trusted his words. Later after 3 months he said he has been talking more to his best friend, spending more time with her, and confessed he lied me about her. I tired to know about her and hang out with her but she is not interested. She wants to hang out only with my boyfriend and not with me.
I feel insecure and his new relationship bothers me lot. I feel stressed. This reply is awesome! This is showing that you truly love yourself.
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That is emotional abuse what he was doing and we should never settle for less. Kudos to you.
Our partners are supposed to cherish and honor us and vice versa. I have guy friends who I used to go out with and they still like me, I have a boyfriend now though, so out of respect for my boyfriend and my relationship, that was cut off.
I disagree. Her feelings of jealousy and inadequacy are valid. Advising someone to undermine their feelings is not healthy. However, if your partner is feeling disrespected, than there should be some consideration of this. This female friends is crossing the line and the guy is allowing it and actively participating. The guy and his female friend should respect the relationship.
Advising the poster to ignore her feelings and look the other way is not helping the situation. If anything, internalizing these emotions can cause detrimental effects to the person overtime. My boyfriend recently told his close friend who is a woman that he needs some space in their friendship while he and I develop our relationship further.
She is divorced, and single, and I feel like she sees him as her male companion. It was really making me feel disrespected and he is so oblivious to how this could hurt me. I was really appreciative when he told her he needed some space because I knew he was doing it to try to make me happy. Well, she blocked him on social media, even though they have been friends for 3 years. And now he is trying to get her to be friends again.
It has totally confirmed what I thought all along that she is clearly very attached to him. My boyfriend is a travel videographer and ever since I have known him, he has had a lot of feale friends in his life.
Over the four years we have been dating, he has had multiple girl best friends they come and go and I had always voiced it to him. Early last year, he met a girl who works in the same field as him. She is attractive, successful and extremely like-able, and soon they became best friends. I also notice that he eats up everything she says and does. I have talked to him about this and he said that even though she ticks all his boxes as the perfect partner, he is not attracted to her.
Is it even possible for someone to be your type but you are not attracted to them?
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I have befriended this girl and i know nothing is going on on her side. Should I trust him? He has the tendency to sweep his emotions under the rug and I am so afraid that he has done the same with his possible feelings for her. First, I would take into consideration that he seems honest with you. He has told you the truth about how he feels about her - and I would believe him. I know it seems impossible, but trusting him is the only way.
Being fearful all the time will only drive him away from her, and I think you know that. The one you really have to trust is yourself, and your self worth, and that everything is always working out for you.
My boyfriend has a girl best friend. Have been friends for over 7 years. Except when I found out one of his girl friends dropped off cookies at Christmas and I had a weird feeling about it. I looked on his phone and found old sex photos of his ex. He apologized.
May 13, Dating A Man Who Has A Strong Female Friendship In His Life Can Be A Little Confusing. Can Men And Women Really Be Just Friends? Find Out Why It May Be A Red Flag If Your Boyfriend's Best Friend Author: Xojane. Oct 23, Your female friends will carefully listen to the unique elements of your current dating drama, and come up with thoughtful and relevant advice; your male friends will tell you that this guy Author: Gabrielle Moss. So you have found an attractive guy that seems to have his life moving in the same direction as yours. All of this may sound too good to be true, maybe that is because you found out that his best.
Deleted them. Said I was welcome on his phone but that he forgot about them they were approx 4 years old. After that he ignored a phone call which he never did before and replied with he was watching a movie with his best friend. I felt weird about that if I was with my best friend I still would have answered. I told him how I was becoming insecure and that I wanted him to help me get through it.
He wants me and my family and instead of helping me to get through it he ended up lying to me about when they hang out and their messages. They hang out weekly and talk every other day at least. In turn getting to know his best friend may create an ally in your corner, according to relationship coach Tracey Steinberg, cited in the Cosmopolitan article, "Should You Be Jealous if Your Boyfriend's Best Friend is a Girl?
Men understand that so much more can be brought out of a friendship when you keep it strictly platonic. If you are truly worried that your guy's relationship with his best friend goes a bit further than just friendship, consider any questionable signs. If he seems secretive about his relationship with his friend, or doesn't seem comfortable with talking to you about his and her relationship, you may want to raise a slight flag. Before pointing any fingers and accusing anyone of any wrong doing, share your feelings with him and let him know why you are concerned.
While men and woman can definitely just be friends there is a mutual attraction that brought them together as friends. Watching out for the signs can help spare hurt feelings in the end. Chances are you may be reading more into the situation.
Dating guy with female best friend
At least talking with him about your feelings can put your mind at ease. If you start to question the relationship between your guy and his friend, or even start to feel insecure about your own relationship, look for signs that he is into you.
If he's actively listening to you and making eye contact when you speak, he has your best interests at heart and is smitten with you.
Maybe he seems a bit giddy or nervous when you two are together.