Last Days Mediator for only the , , - a literal number? Paradise Earth Forever? Preaching - only Witnesses? Jehovah's Witnesses disfellowship those deemed unrepentant wrongdoers, for practices such as disagreeing with Watchtower doctrine, smoking or fornication. A disfellowshipped person is to be shunned by all family and friends, usually for the remainder of their life, so go through tremendous emotional suffering. Although there is Scriptural precedence to limit association with wrongdoers, Watchtower application of disfellowshipping seriously deviates from Bible guidelines in multiple ways.
But I am still perplexed that this organisation can continue to act in this way. Whilst I was disfellowshipped, my cousin stopped going to meetings and begun a relationship with a man. Eventually it was reported to the elders and they came to see her.
Something is. dating a disfellowshipped jehovah witness were
They asked her directly had she had sex with this man and she LIED and said no, knowing full well from my experiences what the consequences would be. She also lied on the suggestion of her dad who is an elder as he didn't want her to be disfellowshipped.
This was my uncle who had stopped talking to me 2 years previously - to keep the congregation clean. She then commenced another relationship with a drug dealer which my whole family were fully aware of.
I ended up living with her and would have to leave the house if the family came to see her - or would I see the cards and presents she would be sent and I yet had no contact for something I had done 2 years previously. She was rewarded for lying, I was punished for telling the truth. I was made to pay the price for honesty. It is beyond my comprehension. I missed my family terribly and decided to play the game. That was how I viewed it, there were rules, I had been stung by them, now I had to bend them.
I went back to the meetings. That first day was the hardest thing I have ever done, walking through those doors but I did it for my family. So i could see them. The only reason. And I felt guilty for giving up my integrity, yet I felt I had no choice.
I went back to the meetings for a year before I was reinstated. That was toughest year of my life by far!
The testimony in your article sums it up perfectly. So many nights I would go to the car and cry my eyes out. That was 3 months ago and i haven't been to a meeting since. I do not feel happy that I had to do things that way, but I have got my family back.
Though its hard not to feel frustration with them. They know what happened to me was so unfair, but can't explain their reasons, other than their loyalty to Jehovah and his organisation.
They can't explain why they continued contact with my cousin and not me, other than I was df'd and she wasn't. I know that part of them knows how wrong it was, but their are too firmly set in their ways to even acknowledge it. My relationship will never be the same with them though. And that is why I wanted to thank you for your article. It is so logical and reasonable and written in a non-dogmatic way.
It's all the things I want to say to my family and can't. But it was cathartic just reading it.
It was the voice of reason. I feel I am a different person now and I have grown so much. I have met a wonderful man who has taught me to trust again. But there are things that I just can't shake. I haven't prayed in a long time and that makes me sad. I ask my boyfriend to pray for me because I want to but can't. Keyword Search for profiles containing a particular word or phrase.
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Dating a disfellowshipped jehovah witness
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Disfellowshipped jehovah witness dating - Is the number one destination for online dating with more relationships than any other dating or personals site. Find single woman in the US with relations. Looking for novel in all the wrong places? Now, try the right place. Register and search over 40 million singles: voice recordings. home > interesting topics > experiences > disfellowshipped wife. Disfellowshipped Wife Hello, I have just been reading some of your articles, particularly the one on disfellowshipping and was moved to write to you. If I may be so bold, I would like to share my story with you. This is one of the reasons your girlfriend is being pressured by her Jehovah's Witness parents to stop dating you and to only date someone who is a Jehovah's Witness. The simple fact that she is dating you puts her "spiritually" in a questionable light among her Jehovah's Witness friends and relatives.
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Y Ppl's Rep. I am going to make a helper for him, as a complement of him. Inthere was a softening of the stance, with release of the following article, but this was short lived.
Unfortunately, this more reasonable stance reverted back to strict shunning inwith a comprehensive discussion in the Watchtower Sep The Watchtower continues to be the standard to be followed, referred to in publications such as the book Keep Yourself in God's Love. The process Jehovah's Witnesses follow for disfellowshipping strays from biblical principles in a number of areas. There should always be clear Scriptural reason for disfellowshipping, and John reprimanded Diotrephes for attempting to throw people out of the congregation unnecessarily at 3 John Bible discussion of shunning by Paul and John is limited to just the following areas; Fornication, Greed, idolatry, Revilers, Practicing Drunkenness, Extortion and One who does not remain in the teaching of the Christ.
Revelation does not relate to shunning but at a stretch could be drawn on, and adds adultery, men kept for unnatural purposes, men who lie with men, thieves, cowards, those without faith, those disgusting in their filth, murderers, spiritism, and liars. The long list of Watchtower offences includes a number of practices never mentioned in regards to shunning, such as use of blood. However, the Watchtower goes even further.
Common practices never specified in the Bible as sins have become grounds for being disfellowshipped. These include:.
If Jehovah wanted his followers to shun those for engaging in these common practices, the Bible would state so. Should the Society be creating disfellowshipping decrees beyond Bible offences? Of course not! Jesus condemned the Pharisees for creating thousands of laws for every situation, rather than promoting Godly principles and understanding the meaning of mercy.
When a Pharisee expressed surprise that Jesus did not do ritual washing before dinner, Jesus' rebuke was particularly harsh. If God spoke directly to the Governing Body as he did with the Apostles and they were infallible, then it may have authority to add to the scriptures.
By their admission this is not the case. The Governing Body is not infallible and not inspired by God to write additional rules that do not appear in the Bible.
For this reason the list should be based strictly on scriptures. Further rules continue to be introduced, such as the Watchtower Jul 15 pp. In determining if a person should be disfellowshipped the elders form a "judicial committee" to meet with the wrongdoer. This is done in private, and the wrongdoer is not allowed an onlooker, lawyer or recording device. The word "judicial committee" does not appear in the Bible and goes against Bible guidelines.
What if the Jehovah's Witnesses 'Disfellowship' Me? ~ with Meg Slaymaker
Both the Israelites and early Christian congregations kept matters open to ordinary persons. Rather than being done in private, in front of elders only, matters were held by Israelites at the city gates so a fair discussion with onlookers could be made, or in front of the Christian congregation. This prevented the injustice that can take place before small closed bodies of elders.
At MatthewJesus instructed that unresolved wrongdoing should be taken "to the congregation", not a select committee of congregation leaders. This is how misdemeanors were originally dealt with. As discussed above, the judicial committee arrangement was not inaugurated until by Knorr. When the person was disfellowshipped or publicly reproved the congregation was to know why.
Paul openly told the congregation of the wrong conduct of Peter, Hymenaeus, Alexander and Diotrephes. To avoid legal problems, the Society does not follow this Scriptural advice. The extent of both the disfellowshipping and disassociating announcement is restricted to:. In the scriptures it makes no mention of a time limit over which the process must take place.
It does indicate that quite some period of time may be involved. To readjust a brother could take considerable time. If a person is addicted to certain practices or if they are having doubts about doctrine it could take months of effort to overcome these. Yet in many cases when a Jehovah's Witness confesses or another person reports their activities to the elders they are disfellowshipped within a few weeks.
Furthermore, if the process is to readjust someone, it implies the person would not be disfellowshipped in the event the offender is readjusted and quits his ways, such as after taking blood or stopping an adulterous affair. Yet the general practice in these cases is automatic disassociation or likely disfellowshipping. Shunning was to be used for readjustment or to protect the congregation.
However it is regularly used as punishment. When a person confesses to a wrong practice committed and ceased many years ago they have often been disfellowshipped for a wrong attitude, which is clearly done for punishment. A review of Insight on the Scriptures, Volume 1 p. Persons can be so traumatised by being disfellowshipped that many contemplate and carry out suicide. It is common to suffer Post Traumatic Shock Disorder.
The harsh stance of the Watchtower has a counter productive affect.
When a baptized Jehovah's Witness is disfellowshipped (expelled) from this religion, his friends and family are required to "shun" him by cutting off all unnecessary contact with him. 1. Since Jehovah's Witnesses are not allowed to have close friends outside of the Watchtower, your boyfriend literally lost everyone close to him when he. Dating includes any social activity in which two people focus romantic interest on each other. It can take place in a group or in private, in the open or in secret, and in person, over the phone, or by text message. Jehovah's Witnesses view dating, not as recreation, but as . Oct 20, Jehovah's Witnesses Dating. JWMatch is a safe and fun place for Jehovah's Witnesses and Friends to build loving and trusting friendships that can lead to lasting, offline relationships. The beauty of meeting and relating online is that you can gradually collect information from people before you make a choice about pursuing the relationship in the real world.
Being Disfellowshipped has been the catalyst to cause many to doubt whether the Watchtower is the true religion. The trauma and effort involved in being reinstated that caused them to begin researching outside Watchtower publications and to come to the conclusion that the Watchtower it is not Gods chosen way.
With many religions when a person no longer believes or is practicing sin they will tend to drift away from Church and associate with like minded individuals outside the congregation.
This is how it is with unbaptised Witness youths; they leave over time, generally in their teens. Most that do not follow Watchtower guidelines or that do not believe it is the Truth stop going to meetings.
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However disfellowshipping is a form of entrapment that forces baptised Witnesses, including myself to spend years going to meetings whilst not believing or adhering to Watchtower regulations. This is done to avoid being disfellowshipped, in order to prevent being shunned by family. By encouraging people to stay and lead double lives disfellowshipping possibly results in more people being influenced than if the wrongdoers are encouraged to drift away.
Since the word disfellowship does not appear in the Scriptures, the New World Translation Reference Bible "Bible words indexed" directs the reader to the term "expelled". The closest Scriptural example the Watchtower can find for the term disfellowship is that of the Pharisees.
The direction given in the Watchtower goes strongly against Christian examples when demanding members hate an apostate. Jesus and Paul both said we should not hate but rather love our enemies.
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This was to apply even when someone is attacking our faith and practice. When discussing a person seduced by apostasy Paul said at 2 Thessalonians And yet do not be considering him as an enemy, but continue admonishing him as a brother. When discussing that for everlasting life it is necessary to love your neighbor as yourself, Jesus used the illustration of the Good Samaritan to explain who ones neighbour is.
Luke The Jews regarded the Samaritans as apostates of the Jewish religion, yet Jesus says our love is to encompass these people as well. At baptism a person commits themselves to the Watchtower Organization, despite the word organization never appearing in the Bible. Few realise that they have committed their bedroom lives, work choices and life long relationship with family and friends to the Organization.
Terms such as ecclesiastical government of Jehovah's Witnesses are never used in the Watchtower publications that are issued to the public, but are terms used within confidential letters to branches and the elders. Would as many people be baptised if they realised it was not only to Jehovah, Jesus and the Holy Spirit that they were being baptised but to an ecclesiastical government that had the right to introduce any rule at any time?
When a person is baptised, very few have even an inkling of the true history of the religion. No person that gets baptised has any idea of the full list of things that they could be disfellowshipped for as this list is unattainable, and many of the reasons are not clearly specified in the Bible.
Most of the reasons are scattered through various Watchtower publications, but a newly interested one is rarely shown all of these. Neither do the Watchtower publications contain a full list of reasons for being disfellowshipped. Even people involved in the organization for years are generally unaware of all the reasons. In regards to disfellowshipping, Pay Attention to Yourselves and to All the Flock states on page that elders should be sure to proceed "in harmony with the most recent statements by the Society.
Apr 25, How to Get Disfellowshipped from Jehovah's Witnesses. There are many things to get you kicked out, or disfellowshipped from Jehovah's Witnesses. Here is a basic list of things. If you do them and aren't sorry and express sincere remorse, you will be counseled in a back room and voted on judicially by men in the congregation.
Ina ated Elder's book - "Shepherd the Flock of God" - was released. Seven of its twelve chapters are devoted to disfellowshipping. A Letter to EldersOct 7, shows how secretive this book is, when it says women are not allowed to bind the book, even under supervision:. Even elders do not get to know the guidelines for all situations, as more difficult scenarios are discussed in letters specifically to the Bethel Branches.
Most people are baptised with no knowledge that these books and letters even exist, let alone know what is contained in them. How much information did Jesus provide the Apostles that he forbade sharing with anyone else? A religion that disfellowships and shuns should be transparent with providing full access to information regarding these rules prior to a persons involvement, rather than hiding it even from long term members.
It is particularly disturbing that the Watchtower encourages children raised as Jehovah's Witnesses to be baptised as minors. Even a pre-teenage child can get baptised and for the remainder of their life be subject to the principle of being disfellowshipped. Baptism as a Jehovah's Witness is a binding verbal contract with the Watchtower Society and as such baptising minors is wrong both legally and scripturally.
Never is the baptism of a minor mentioned in the Bible. Jesus was not baptised until he was 30 and Jews felt a person became an adult at When Cornelius and his family were baptised it does not state that any non adults were baptised and there is no scriptural evidence of any children or teenagers ever being baptised. A childs knowledge and ideas change dramatically between the teens and twenties, and for this reason the law protects the rights of minors.
A minor is usually not permitted by law to enter contracts, drink, vote, join the army or marry. When a person baptised as a minor chooses they no longer wish to be known as a Jehovah's Witness they are regularly disfellowshipped. Once this happens that teenager may not associate freely with family or friends for the remainder of their life! Even a person that is still a child they can be disfellowshipped.
The New Testament never specifically extends shunning to immediate family members. Rather Paul stated at 1 Timothy. The following 17 minute recording was taken by a girl attempting to be reinstated, and highlights the procedure well. It starts slowly, but is quite heartbreaking at the end. You will probably agree with the girl's comment regarding the elders lack of heart.
If your browser does not support this audio element, download as a MP3 8. In the parable of the prodigal son Jesus outlined the type of love the Father has for us and that we should show each other. Luke The youngest child of a rich family spent years squandering his inheritance living a life involved in numerous contemptible sins. Jesus showed that despite this, on seeing his son return home the aged father ran to his child with open arms.
He did not wait to question the sons current actions, did not attempt to determine his sons motives and repentance, nor give him a period of lower status as punishment. Nowhere in the Bible does it discuss a detailed process for reinstatement, nor give a timeframe in regards to how long before reinstatement can take place.
Paul simply stated that a person who is a wrongdoer should be avoided. When they are no longer practicing the wrongdoing there is no reason to keep shunning them.
The Watchtower however requires a formal reinstatement process through the body of elders. The Watchtower specifies a period of time to pass, even though acknowledging the Christian example allows for shorter periods. Though the scriptures give no legalistic approach to determine when a wrongdoer is to be associated with, the Watchtower Society has developed a formalistic procedure for determining if a person is worthy of having their disfellowshipped status removed.
They must attend meetings regularly for several months whilst being shunned before an application for reinstatement will be considered. After this they must be examined by the elders to determine if they have ceased the wrongdoing and have a repentant attitude.
Once this is determined, a public announcement is made. Only after this procedure and announcement are family members and others within the congregation free to talk to that person. Take the fairly common example of an engaged couple that commit fornication in the weeks prior to their wedding. If discovered they may be disfellowshipped.
Once married they are not immediately reinstated as time is made to pass before their request for reinstatement will be considered. They then are forced to go through the formal process of being deemed repentant. Yet on the day of their marriage they are no longer fornicators as they are scripturally married.
There is no scriptural reason they should no longer be associated with.